Celebrating the 50th Anniversary of 007, Having Some Fun With Bond, James Bond.
James Bond, as conceived by author Ian Fleming, is a suave but professional secret agent who doubles as an assassin. He is cold, detached and is, in Fleming's words, "an anonymous, blunt instrument wielded by a government department." Gosh and I thought that was this years’ tax accounts manual!
Q: What do you call James Bond in the bath?
A: Bubble-O-7
A chicken crossed the road and met James Bond. ‘What’s your name?’ asked the chicken.
Bond, James Bond. What’s yours?’
Ken, Chick Ken.
Bond’s favorite drink is the classic vodka Martini, shaken, not stirred which he drinks a lot of without ever getting squiffy. In the Bond films up to Casino Royale, Bond is seen to consume 114 drinks, the equivalent of one every 24.3 minutes. Interestingly enough, he drinks champagne more than anything (35 glasses) and only tries one beer and that was product placement BOL.
Bond’s favorite meal is scrambled eggs and coffee.
After the release of Die Another Day, Pierce Brosnan was approached by a man in a Dublin bar who asked to shake his hand. He obliged and then cracked up when the man said: "That's the closest my hand will ever get to Halle Berry's bottom".
There are only seven 00s. You’re forgiven if you were under the impression that Bonds’ MI6 organization was heaving with agents. Bond is one of just seven 00 agents spying for the British, but he is good at staying alive, just. In different movies we’ve witnessed the deaths of agents 002, 003, 004, and 009. Agent 006 was believed killed but returned as the villain in GoldenEye before he’s bumped off. Bonds’ only competition comes from the unnamed agent 008. He’s mentioned several times as Bond’s replacement should he die or be sacked for gross misconduct. As for 001 and 005 it is a mystery why they have ever been mentioned.
Ask the blokes what is the best Bond gadget and you may get Ursula Andress' bikini by a mile and if it was self-removing Q should get a knighthood.
James Bond's astrological sign is Scorpio. Yep we knew there had to be sting in the tail.
Bond was sitting at a bar when a pretty blonde sat next to him, James looked at his watch, looked back at the girl then looked back his watch.
The girl said "whats wrong, is your date late"
James said "No, I have just got a new watch which tells me about the girl sitting next to me"
The girl said "whats wrong, is your date late"
James said "No, I have just got a new watch which tells me about the girl sitting next to me"
The girl said "so what does it tell you about me?"
James replied "it says your not wearing any underwear"
The girl said "Well I am"
James said "Sorry Love - this must be an hour fast.
Happy Anniversary James Bond.
We received this award from the super California Dreamin Blog and we say a heartfelt thank you and we will pop it on our awards page with pride.
Oh Molly, you made made me laughing with this special Post - we love Mr.Bond and you did a funny and a Great Job today on my Birthday.
ReplyDeleteWuff and LG
Aiko
haha now I know why we got a new James Bond from time to time, I'll bet they need a REHAB with all those Martini's
ReplyDeleteOh oh another brilliant post Molly! Sorry for not being around so much lately, but we are having a few problems with the Young One -alias Malach- chewing everything in the room! The humans are even talking of the dreaded crate/cage/prison for him... Have you ever been naughty Molly? A clever girl like you must be up to some mischief sometimes!
ReplyDeleteLots of love, from Indigo and Malach!
I can always, I mean, ALWAYS COUNT ON YOU MIZ MOLLY, to put a guffaw in my morning! I best not be drinking my tea when I read your words, for I shall spit it out onto my computer screen from the laughter!
ReplyDeleteI just love your ways. My goodness you two, YES, YOU TWO....you are brilliant comedians and hands down, you are so talented. I LOVE THAT JOKE ABOUT THE WATCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Loving it!!! Love that "Bubble-O-7" too!
ReplyDeleteMOL Molly
ReplyDeleteKen Chick Ken cracked mom up. thank goodness she wasn't drinking her coffee.
Loving that lavender scarf too
Hugs Madi your BFFF
Bol! Love the one about the underwear!
ReplyDeleteLovies, Miss Mindy
Made us laugh and grown (Ken, Chick Ken!)
ReplyDeleteHave a good day, Lee and Phod
Oh Molly, we can't stop laughing again here. You always seem to crack us up!
ReplyDeleteBubble 0-7...... Oh the thought!
Hugs,
Lily Belle & Muffin
Oh my goodness, this had me cracking up! I love it, Bubble-07 had me laughing out loud. Brilliant, post.
ReplyDeleteBTW I'm properly thanking you on my blog today for showcasing us in share it Sunday!
Molly - this is the ultimate of ultimate posts! Love James Bond and thanks for all the great background info - you are the best!
ReplyDeleteHave a great day - can't wait to see what you post next - but I don't think you're going to top the J.B. post!
Katie
www.westiejulep.blogspot.com
Aw, that Chick Ken joke was awesome :D
ReplyDeleteCotton
Oh Molly that was a great post...I didn't know anything about james bond now I could go on a game show about him and win a big ole prize.
ReplyDeleteDad said he would be visiting you to cook up some bacon later today. He told us he may stay over and do a little Christmas shopping and stop by and see my boyfriend Stan who lives in Morecrombe.
Enjoy!
Stella
The suitcase joke was the funny one for me! The look on Daniel Craig's face is priceless....Oh, and BTW, he's by far my least favorite of the Bonds for me....just doesn't have the sex appeal the others did....
ReplyDeleteBubble 07, you just crack us up Molly, Have a great day xx00xx
ReplyDeleteMollie and Alfie
Good think I wasn't drinking anything during the reading of this post. LOL!!!!
ReplyDeletethe man of many lines...
ReplyDeleteHap-Pee Anniversary, 007!
ReplyDelete:o)
Molly, you are hilarious! Stay away from those martinis!
ReplyDeleteSusan and Wrigs
Oh my! This is great!
ReplyDeleteYou are hilarious! I've never been much of a Bond fan but I might learn a new appreciation after reading all your posts. Though, I'll probably always prefer your version. More dogs. :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks for the funny fact list on Mr.Bond. Mom has gotten to like the Bond films more as the years go on. But she is very disappointed at the demise of M:(
ReplyDeleteThanks for the laughs today.
Woos - Phantom, Thunder, Ciara, and Lightning
We will have to tell Dad to read this, he is a big Bond fan!
ReplyDeleteDip Bridge and Elliot x
Love the jokes. The newest Bond movie is having a big premier here tonight. SHE has NEVER seen a Bond movie! (But loves Dame Judi)
ReplyDeleteOur human cousin's name is Ian Fleming......
XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy
Oh...BOL, Bubble-O- 7
ReplyDeleteBenny & Lily
"Bubble - 0 - 7." Ha roo roo roo!
ReplyDeletePlay bows,
Zim
PS: You're the prettiest of all the Bond girls!
kkkkkkkkk Adoro suas postagens!
ReplyDeleteSempre me faz rir bastante!!!
Beijos e maravilhosa sexta-feira!!!!
Molly you always crack us up!!
ReplyDeleteYour Pals,
Murphy & Stanley
Gosh you know so much about 007. Can you do the same thing for Doctor Who?
ReplyDeleteNow this made me chuckle! :)
ReplyDeleteLove, love, loved it. Loved the chicken joke, might just have to repeat it! Thanks for making me smile!
ReplyDeleteMolly you are the one! =************
ReplyDeleteMY MOM LOVED that suitcase bit!
ReplyDelete~Mason
Oh Molly, that was just classic. We loved every word of it. If mum wasn't such an old tart, she'd line up to be in the Paternity suit section hehe. No worries, and love, Stella and Rory
ReplyDeleteI'll never be able to see James Bond the same way again :D
ReplyDeleteYou are too funny Molly - where do you come up with all this stuff?
What a great post. So much fun. Congrats on your award!
ReplyDelete