The Ladbrokes Barkingham Palace Gold Cup On Fun Friday!

All barks are off as the new royal baby will be named Alexandra if these racind corgis are to be believed. So on fun Friday we bring you The Ladbrokes Barkingham Palace Gold Cup. Enjoy.

Have a fabulous Friday all. 

Not Lost In Translation On Fun Friday!

After last week's disaster with the cat talking app we thought we'd have a look a dog talking again. 

Here is what are top five would look like.....

NB But we so appreciate considerate cyclist. 

So my anipals what would yours be?

Have a fabulous Friday all and don't get lost in translation.

OMD I Hate Lycra On Moanday Monday!

We thought we could do with this sign on our park after nearly getting run down this week by one of those Lycra Louts. 

Said idiot nearly went......

and nearly ended up like this.....

So we say....

We should put up a sign saying beware....

Or you might end up.....

Grrrrr we hate Lycra Louts do you? Have a mravellous Monday all.

Move Over Or Move Out, On Moanday Monday!

My most desired location apart from my sleeping quarters are the oven, fridge, ping-ping microwave, dog bowl and lastly dustbin but not in any particular order. However best of all of those is the big bed. Sleeping arrangements however are fruaght with difficulties. When my basket is full of cartons, wrappers, chewed up slippers and post, the big bed will do but space management is an issue as I need to stretch out. So the other morning after giving she who must be obeyed ignored a good kick when doing a bit of DOGA she retaliated. Yes without a word of apology she pushed me right off the bed. I landed in an ungainly heap on the floor and she just turned over and attempted to go back to sleep. Well that defintely could not go unchallenged so I leapt back on to the bed and sat on her pillow above her head and made a stinky smell. LOL she was furious and needless to say that got her up and dressed in record time. The trails and tribulations of human ownership. Would your peeps kick you out of bed for doing a bit of DOGA? Now let us hope she has learnt he lesson.

Have a marvellous Monday all.

Mud Glorious Mud On MoanDay Monday!

So I am giving her the stinky eyes because after..............

one of these in one of ...........

these........she who must be ignored obeyed decided it was time for some............

waterboarding................and she said she would write a book all about it............

and it would be a best seller. Hmmmm what do you think? I think I need to call Ernie The Attorney as after 'Mince Gate, 'Snout Gate' and now 'Grime Gate' I could do with some serious legal representation. 

Frankie & Ernie!

Have a marvellous Monday all.

Musings Of A Legend On Moanday Monday!

I am legend or as peeps would say I am more leg end than legend. Everybody knows me for my hunting prowess, my ability to turn on a dime as I chase the various vermin that haunt my neighbourhood. However after 'Mince Gate' last week it would appear that she who must be obeyed ignored has lost the plot. She plods round the park slower than molasses in Winter and seems to have a very short fuse these days.  I mean as CK would say she is one chip short of a happy meal. So imagine my frustration when after running amok amongst the trees chasing those bushy tailed varmints she screamed at me MOLLY ENOUGH! Yep like a banshee she yelled at me and if that was not enough she grabbed me by my snout. Yes it was a full frontal nasal assault. She pretended she smacked my snout by accident but I know that is not true. Yes I was abused and what was worse was I was so shocked that I stood still which facilitated her being able to leash me and drag me away from territory. Of course I put my butt down but 17 kilos of pure hunting muscle was not going to get the better of my captor. Didn't help that this was officiated by anther round of applause from random people watching on. Have your staff ever assaulted you? She should be dismissed for gross negligence but then again I will wait till after dinner.

A Guilty F\ace She Said On Meaty Mischief Monday!

So she who must be obeyed ignored went to do some shopping and left me home alone for like 87 gazillion hours. On her return she dropped the shopping on the floor and raced upstairs to the toilet. Well what was a dog to do? A quick game of Supermaket Sweep was in order I say. So snooping into the bag I located a bag of mince and without a second thought I fangtastically managed to get a couple of mouthfuls before I heard the ominous sound of footsteps descending down the stairs. So I rushed straight to my hidey hole behind the sofa. It wasn't long before I heard her call to arms... the shrieking of the word MOLLY at a pitch that could crack the glass in the cockpit of a low flying passenger jet. Then there were the very unladylike HBO words followed by slamming of kitchen cupboards and the like. It later transpired that

Tear + Weight Of Meat + Gravity = Meat On Kitchen Floor

. 

Now I cannot understand why she served me cooked mince for several meals later accompanied by mumblings, dirty looks and the banging of my dinner bowl. Less of a happy meal more of one delivered with menace in her yes. Sadly you just can't get good staff these. Have you ever snuffled something good before your peeps realised?

Have a marvellous Monday and do try to snuffle a mouthful of something good today.

In Memory Of Pippin On Monday!

Last year when Pippin could no longer go to the park we thought we would bring the park to her. This year we put up her tree and take a moment to remember our sweet one who we lost a year ago today. She is greatly missed and not a day goes by that we don't think about her.

In memory of Pippin and a moment's pause to think of those who have lost loved ones.

Have a marvellous Monday all.

Munchies On Mischief Moanday Monday!

Sometime when she who must be obeyed ignored remembers to feed me I get a can of sardines in olive oil to keep my furs looking nice and shiny. I have to admit it brings out the feline in me and I do enjoy a little fishy in my dishy. Well last week after I had been fed peeps was pleased when I came over to say thank you. She then proceeded to do things I have not the remotest interest in like house work. Trouble was she could not shake the fishy smell wafting around everywhere she went. She was in a right two and eight (state) about where this smell was coming from. Being cerebrally challenged it took a while to figure it out.

Do you ever use your human as a napkin? Surely that is one good use of a pair of legs.

As for my human........

Have a marvellous Monday and don't forget to include some mischief.

Malfunction On Moanday Monday & Breaking Bad!

Me last time I had a brake failure with insulting blue bandage.

Yes it was a case of braking bad last week. Yep some crack was involved.

...... but not the illegal kind. I was busy terrorizing my territories when it happened. I gave chase to a pesky tree rat and .........there was an epic failure in my emergency brakes. I crash landed into some shrubbery and got an ouchie on my paws for my troubles. Luckily for me the vet gave me the all clear and some treats so I am fine to get back to the important task of eradicating varmints from my park.

  
Alas what is a dog to do when there is vermin to hunt? You just got to suck it up and get on with the job in hand paw. Have a marvellous Monday all and don't forget to include some mischief today. 

Mischief & Medicine Needed On Moanday Monday!

The weather had been wonderful and joy of all joys the squirrels are back in the park after an absence of what seems like 87 gazillion days. 

I venture to my spying location and look yonder for signs of those pesky tree rats.

Happy days I launch a mega bark fest. Now peeps is very tolerant but sometimes she says enough is enough and tries to coax me to stop. Hey no way am I listening to 'She Who Must Be Obeyed Ignored'. Switch on the selective hearing mode and there is no stopping me unless she tries to get hold of me. Then ensues a merry dance as she plays 'catch me if you can'. 

OK so first law in hunting any prey is make sure you are aware of your surrounding. At no time stomp off to capture dog running amok in the woods without looking where you are going. At no time thump heavy footed into stinging nettles and do not resort to using HBO words and blaming me for your stupidity. Also please note I did not force you to wear shorts or sandals. Her behaviour was truly shocking as she jumped up and down on the spot yelling and cussing like a fishmonger's wife......which reminds me..........

is nearly upon us. Keep your eyes peeled.

Have a marvellous Monday and mischief and meyhem is the name of the game. 

Moanday Monday & A Truce In No Man's Land!

So she who must be obeyed ignored said she'd had enough of the situation with Mr.Stinky. The last straw was the other day when we were off to the park and peeps was locking the front door with her back to the gate just as he was passing by. I lunged, she squealed in pain, he jumped in the air and all hell broke loose. Next thing I know my sorry butt is dragged mercilessly towards Mr.Stinky. I was forced to sit and shut up. She even glared at me whilst apologising to said man whose name is Brian. So she tells Brian to ignore me as I am all mouth and no trousers which actually is true. He then said he's be brave and give me a pet and OMD he did after I tried and run and hide behind peeps legs. Nope she was having none of it and made me sit right in front of him. Anyways turns out he is quite a nice chappy as he knew latin and knew what the tile on the side of our front door read. 'Beware of dog' from a famous mosaic in Pompeii. Well what can you do if a learned man appreciates us dogs and our famous guarding skill? Forgive and let's have a truce in no man's land. Not saying it will be waggy tails or anything but may be I'll find a new victim to terrorize. For now them I might be nice to Brian. Have you ever forgiven anyone?

Have a marvellous Monday all. 

When A Lark In The Park Is Too Much Fun On Friday!

The longest we have ever been in the park is just over 4 hours as I ran around refusing to come back as I was having such a good time. This use to be quite a regular occurrence much to the frustration of she who must be obeyed ignored. So this bought back happy memories and we thought why not just vocalise your protest? If you don't want to go you tell them. 

Have a fabulous Friday all and have fun.

Life Is Pants On Moanday Monday!

So you all know there is nothing like a good roll in stinky goodness. Well after they took down the big blue tent and all the festival goers had gone home.........

My park looked a bit ruff to put it mildly. 

So when she who must be obeyed ignored wasn't looking I attempted a good old roll.......

Thwarted I planned my next roll............

Needless to say she blew like a gasket. Screeching like a mad woman (she is) she grabbed me and dragged my sorry but home. 

Life is pants when you can't roll in stinky goodness. It was out with those smelly aloe vera wipes when I got home and she called me a filthy beast. Oh hum well tomorrow is another day.

Have a marvellous Monday all and don't forget to include some mischief today.

Bad Dog Or What On Fun Friday?

Now when not asleep we all like a bit of mischief and some fun so mark you diaries as Tuesday 9th of September is Bad Dog Day on Animal Planet channel 415. The documentary features some of the naughtiest and inventive pets to date. I am so going to be watching it as you never know what ideas or tips I can use when next planning mischief.

Have a fabulous Friday all and make room for some fun today.