Tuesday 8 January 2013

Dog House Blog, Have I A Bad Reputation?


Molly The Wally Squirrel Hunting!


Molly The Wally asks is my squirrel obsession out of control?


Serial criminal who do more taking than giving over the festive period will receive an unwelcome Christmas card over the holidays from the police. Repeat offenders will be sent tidings of goodwill by Surrey Police reminding them of the consequences if they re-offend. ‘Remember we know who you are and where you live,’ warns a message in the card. ‘If you persist in criminal activity we will hunt you down and we will lock you up.’ These form part of an anti- burglary campaign, dubbed ‘Operation Candlelight’, aimed at reducing the traditional rise in crime over the winter months. Imagine my consternation when I received this in the post. It came with a file!

Molly The Wally Squirrel Hunting! 1

Molly The Wally Squirrel Hunting! 2

We know where you are and what you have been doing it read!

Molly The Wally Squirrel Hunting! 3

We have seen you out on the park stalking it told me. Stalking? Me, a stalker?

Molly The Wally Squirrel Hunting! 4

You will be prosecuted for noise pollution if you do not refrain from excessive barking it informed me.

Molly The Wally Squirrel Hunting! 5

Furthermore I am told I will be fined for damaging park property. Evidence includes shaking tree stumps to knock squiggles out of trees.

Molly The Wally Squirrel Hunting! 6

Using branches to shake trees which often come off in my mouth.

Molly The Wally Squirrel Hunting! 7

Don’t they realise I do a very impawtant job? Ridding Suburbia of vermin is my role. I need legal representation. My reputation has been besmirched. What am I to do?

Score for 2012. Scalp count, after approximately 750 dog hours of dedication, a pitiful, miserable, woeful, pathetic and deplorable, zero, nothing, none, nitch, nada, nowt, NOT ONE.

Oh well 2013 is another year!

51 comments:

  1. Don't give up, dear Molly, a squirrel is always waiting for you out there! If only we could join our forces! I try very hard every day, but they are very quick! I have even some of them in my garden and they seem to laugh at me, because I am locked inside!
    So try hard too and you will catch one sooner or later! Good luck! And of course you need more burglary delicts to occupy the police in the meanwhile! ;)

    Nice regards
    Arno

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  2. Pfftttt. Send them back a card with the words 'I know where you live, TOO'. A bit of squirrel fur in the card will do the trick.

    Wooo,
    Togo, Tagar & Gamby

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  3. Molly you will get your squiggle yet! I have found that persistence pays much to Mom's chagrin. Success will be yours my furiend :D

    Waggin at ya,
    Roo

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  4. Oh for pete's sake! Don't everyone know them tree rats are just vermin???? SHEESH! I'll save you from the police Molly!
    Lovies, Miss Mindy

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  5. Wow!! Very impressive hunting but sorry you haven't caught one of those tree rats yet. I agree Sharkgila, send a note right back to them.

    Did the website let you in to see Aunt Judy.

    {{{huggies}}}.....Mona

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  6. We dont think you are obsessed, just dedicated as any good dog should be

    urban hounds

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  7. It is a good thing the pawlice don't worry about such things around here. Of course you have an important job to get those squirrels!

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  8. Go get em Molly,you sure is a natural at Squiggle chasing..BOL Have a super Tuesday.. I won't tell em where you live :) xx00xx

    Mollie and Alfie

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  9. After hundreds and hundreds of tries, Wilson has only ever caught a squirrel one time. And it didn't turn out well for Wilson. He got a nasty bite to his lower lip and a trip to the emergency vet. Not before he dispatched the culprit though.
    So be happy (or careful) that you haven't caught one as they definitely fight back!

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  10. Molly Molly Molly you are one fine huntress great form and style. I enjoyed your saga but my mom was 100% distracted by and I quote her, "Molly's shiny, wavy, gorgeous black furs"! She says she would love to have furs like yours on her head. Silly Mom!
    Hugs Madi your BFFF

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  11. Oh my! The squirrels on Remington Drive are my friends....even poor Simon who has a drinking problem....maybe instead of hunting them....just be friends with them....they have quite a sense of humor!

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  12. Molly...think seriously about getting yourself a disguise. I don't wants to see you locked up even though all your Blogville pals will put together a big jail break.

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  13. That card must of gone to the wrong house. You are only making your corner of the world safe from the evil squirrels. I bet you were suppose to get a thank you card.
    Blessings,
    Goose

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  14. Oh dear, I am SO LATE HERE!

    I agree with GOOSE; that card had to be sent to the wrong domicile. YOU MIZ MOLLY are a great ASSET to the community, and I would venture to say that YOU COULD BE OF GREAT help in my garden. I just saw the two HEFTIEST SQUIGGLES in my tree yesterday, both of them with a 5 inch long hunk of baguette! THEY LEFT CRUMBS in my garden!

    You must get counsel on a retainer. You will be hit more than once, rest assured!

    You are a just a hoot.

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  15. There's just something about those squirrels! Perhaps you can plead insanity.

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  16. You have a WONDERFUL reputation Molly. Everybuddy who is ANYbuddy knows that Chasing and even DEADING Squiggles is OUR most impawtant job in the whole universe..
    WE agree with Goose... that card must have been Misdirected!

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  17. Molly, you keep on doing that chasing thingy, as a Blogville Police Officer and now training world wide, I will look into this misscarriage of justice. I do believe this was a hoaks, place by your park Squirrels.
    No fear, Officer Bites is on the Case.

    Your Pals
    Susie & officer Bites

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  18. Hope you don't end up behind bars, that is a pretty ominous message - be scared, be very scared!
    That squirrel looks almost as big is us, BOL.
    Dip Bridge and Elliot x

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  19. My scalp count looks like yours....there is something wrong with the tree rats.
    We should invite the squirrels for a giant nut party and then we got them all ;o)

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  20. too cute. :)

    that was an eastern meadowlark on my blog today. :)

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  21. Maybe you could lure them down to the ground with some fruits...You might wanna wear a wig to throw off those cops, though...

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  22. You deserve an award for all your hard work!

    Nora

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  23. I is so glad I not lives theres cuz my arse would already be in jail withs da key thrown away...but at least it is a cute card...hehehehe.
    Don't worry I not has a good reputation eithers so we can just hang out togedders...and hunt. Maybe I could climb on your shoulders to reach da squirrels in da tree.

    Puddles

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  24. I've been involved with jail breaks in Blogville before so no worries there. We are old hands at that sort of thing.

    Yours,

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  25. Oh Molly, how upsetting & despite the photographic evidence we are certain you have been set up! With any luck Officer Bites will get it all sorted out for you - we have the utmost faith in him.

    chin up buttercup
    Wally & Sammy

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  26. Molly there's some cold weather on the way - then those squirrelly vermin will be shivvering in their nests - hibernating too - when their guard is down ....

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  27. GO FOR IT MOLLY!!!! you can do it, just put on your squirrel'n wings and take off. bet you could if you wanted :) no, according to jesse there was so such thing as having an obsession when it came to squirrels and bunnies- and that's the dog honest truth! I think we need you to come visit us for a few days, when we go on walks now the squirrels and bunnies just laugh at S and me- they don't even look up from their tasks...we're pretty bad at chase'n them away. :(

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  28. Bah, ignore those pawlice, they just don't want to loose the opportunity to lose out on another responsibility - tree-rat eliminating! They probably think its such a good idea, they'll start dong it themselves!
    Pip

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  29. They are way too tough, you need a disguise when you go out. Then they won't know who you are.

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  30. You iz being framed Molly...They got no evidence...Iz all circumstashel ...Must be sqwerrel conspiracy...Stay strong!

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  31. You were working very hard and obviously word is getting out about how diligent you are in your duties!

    Keep Calm & Bark On,

    Murphy & Stanley

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  32. BOL LOOK AT THOSE PEASANT PEOPLES WATCHING YOU!! They should mind there own business!
    Love Milo :)

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  33. Oh Molly everyone loves you here in blogworld, and no one would think you would ever be a seriel squirrel killer, geeze remember my dad feeds them to KEEP them in our yard! If you were a true killer, you would be found stalking them around here.......
    stella rose

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  34. I don't think the Po Po have a case and if they persist in harassing you, you have my number.

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  35. Uh oh, Molly...I hope you will not be in too much trouble! I mean squirrels maybe be tiny little guys, but I'd hate to think what a whole giant bunch of them could do to a pup.

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  36. That sounds suspiciously like a squirrel had a paw in that letter....

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  37. I think you need to find yourself a good barrister and have them on retainer... just sayin'

    Shelle, Milo, Dixie and Newby,
    http://simpaticodreams.blogspot.com/

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  38. Sometimes rattling a cage can be just as satisfying as catching one of those old tree rats.

    Pat
    Critter Alley

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  39. Molly....
    Those pawlice are such killjoy!! That felt so good to write!! ;op
    Love, Raelyn.... And Rose, my BEAUTIFULLY UNIQUE "Mystery Dog"!!

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  40. Don;t let them lock you up!
    love
    tweedles

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  41. Lol... I hear that Cathy Keisha is a good lawyer, maybe you should contact her. Also, I read that there is a Squirrel Appreciation Day this month (I don't remember the date) and thought of you! Although I'm not sure how much appreciation you'll be showing towards them after reading this!

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  42. Sooner or later you will win Molly
    Benny & Lily

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  43. BOL, Molly :)
    Have a great day!
    Stewey

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  44. Keep up the good works. Ignore the hatemail, it's not the pawlice it's those squirrels!!

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  45. Hang in there, you will get one. Over here in the US Jan 21 is squirrel apprechiation day.

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  46. Even if you haven't caught one, you've kept them out of too much mischief when they're stuck up a tree waiting for you to go away!

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  47. Hey Molly, Our mama is rolling on the floor laughing so just ignore her. We think you are one very brave warrior in the war on varmints. Don't let those silly squirrels intimidate you, keep up the good work.

    Your fans,
    Cindi Lou & The Kitty Krew

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  48. Squirrels just have to be chased--what else can a dog do?!

    Susan and Wrigs

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