Wednesday, 28 November 2012
Dog House Blog, Santa Paws Is Coming To Town!
From Molly The Wally
Dear Santa Paws,
I can explain any incident of naughtiness that has been attributed to me this year. Firstly some were definitely due to mistaken identify, others were when I was falsely accused and rest were down to the cat (even if we haven’t got one). In truth I have done nothing wrong this year and I have been as good as gold. I will not lie to you, there is no better dog in the whole neighbourhood. With this in mind I am asking you to give me the following for Christmas:-
Squirrels and Treats.
Christmas before last I asked for squirrels and treats. You sent me an extra large bag of kibble-lite. You know how I hate the devil food. They are just cardboard masquerading as biscuits. I also got a new dog bowl which was blue. It should have been pink. Epic FAIL, Santa!
Last year I asked for squirrels and treats. You sent me another large bag of kibble-lite and a hideous eco-friendly dog jumper in Tango Orange. It didn’t fit and I hated it. Another epic FAIL Santa!
This year I am asking for squirrels and treats. No kibble-lite, no bowls or jumpers and NO ECO-FRIENDLY stuff. Just squirrels and treats. I will remind you dear Santa that if you fail to meet my most urgent requests I will hunt you down and bite your ankles. I will chase Rudolph, Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donder, and Blitzen all the way from Pole to Pole and bite their tails. I will pee and poop in the Elves shoes. You won’t get any mince pies or sherry and the silly reindeer won’t get any carrots. Do I make myself clear? Don’t make me come all the way to the North Pole now. If I end up with snow on my paws I will be very, very angry.
PS Red is so not your colour and you are fat. You could do with some kibbles-lite.
Squirrels and Treats. Capiche!
Best wishes Molly.
I think Santa will get it right this year, don’t you think?